Aviation jokes Jokes Funny Aviation jokes Jokes
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There are 110 Aviation jokes Jokes in this category.
A small twoseater Cessna plane crashed into from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
A small two-seater Cessna 152 plane crashed into a cemetery early this afternoon in central Poland. Polish search and rescue workers have recovered 300 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the evening.
A small two-seater Cessna 152 plane crashed into a cemetery early this afternoon in central Poland. Polish search and rescue workers have recovered 300 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the evening.
A military cargo plane flying over a from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
A military cargo plane, flying over a populated area, suddenly loses power and starts to nose down. The pilot tries to pull up, but with all their cargo, the plane is too heavy. So he yells to the soldiers in back to throw things out to make the plane lighter. They throw out a pistol. "Throw out more!" shouts the pilot. So they throw out a rifle. "More!" he cries again. They heave out a missile, and the pilot regains control. He pulls out of the dive and lands safely at an airport. They get into a jeep and drive off. Pretty soon they meet a boy on the side of the road who's crying. They ask him why he's crying and he says "A pistol hit me on the head!" They drive more and meet another boy who's crying even harder. Again they ask why and the boy says, "A rifle hit me on the head!" They apologize and keep driving. They meet a boy on the sidewalk who's laughing hysterically. They ask h im, "Kid, what's so funny?" The boy replies, "I sneezed and a house blew up!"
A military cargo plane, flying over a populated area, suddenly loses power and starts to nose down. The pilot tries to pull up, but with all their cargo, the plane is too heavy. So he yells to the soldiers in back to throw things out to make the plane lighter. They throw out a pistol. "Throw out more!" shouts the pilot. So they throw out a rifle. "More!" he cries again. They heave out a missile, and the pilot regains control. He pulls out of the dive and lands safely at an airport. They get into a jeep and drive off. Pretty soon they meet a boy on the side of the road who's crying. They ask him why he's crying and he says "A pistol hit me on the head!" They drive more and meet another boy who's crying even harder. Again they ask why and the boy says, "A rifle hit me on the head!" They apologize and keep driving. They meet a boy on the sidewalk who's laughing hysterically. They ask h im, "Kid, what's so funny?" The boy replies, "I sneezed and a house blew up!"
As migration approached two elderly vultures doubted from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
As migration approached, two elderly vultures doubted they could make the trip south, so they decided to go by airplane. When they checked their baggage, the attendant noticed that they were carrying two dead raccoons. "Do you wish to check the raccoons through as luggage?" she asked. "No, thanks," replied the vultures. "They're carrion."
As migration approached, two elderly vultures doubted they could make the trip south, so they decided to go by airplane. When they checked their baggage, the attendant noticed that they were carrying two dead raccoons. "Do you wish to check the raccoons through as luggage?" she asked. "No, thanks," replied the vultures. "They're carrion."
Pilot Jones tower Cessna student pilot I from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
Pilot: "Jones tower, Cessna 12345, student pilot, I am out of fuel." Tower: "Roger Cessna 12345, reduce airspeed to best glide!! Do you have the airfield in sight?!?!!" Pilot: "Uh...tower, I am on the south ramp; I just want to know where the fuel truck is."
Pilot: "Jones tower, Cessna 12345, student pilot, I am out of fuel." Tower: "Roger Cessna 12345, reduce airspeed to best glide!! Do you have the airfield in sight?!?!!" Pilot: "Uh...tower, I am on the south ramp; I just want to know where the fuel truck is."
USAir recently introduced a special half fare from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
USAir recently introduced a special half fare for wives who accompanied their husbands on business trips. Expecting valuable testimonials, the PR department sent out letters to all the wives of businessmen who had used the special rates, asking how they enjoyed their trip. Letters are still pouring in asking, "What trip?"
USAir recently introduced a special half fare for wives who accompanied their husbands on business trips. Expecting valuable testimonials, the PR department sent out letters to all the wives of businessmen who had used the special rates, asking how they enjoyed their trip. Letters are still pouring in asking, "What trip?"
Should the cabin lose pressure oxygen masks from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
"Should the cabin lose pressure, oxygen masks will drop from the overhead area. Please place the bag over your own mouth and nose before assisting children or other adults acting like children."
"Should the cabin lose pressure, oxygen masks will drop from the overhead area. Please place the bag over your own mouth and nose before assisting children or other adults acting like children."
Tower Hawk is this the same aircraft from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
Tower: Hawk 20, is this the same aircraft declaring emergency about two hours ago ? Pilot: Negativ, Sir. It's only the same pilot.
Tower: Hawk 20, is this the same aircraft declaring emergency about two hours ago ? Pilot: Negativ, Sir. It's only the same pilot.
Tower Whats your heigth and positionPilot Well from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
Tower: What's your heigth and position? Pilot: Well, I'm 6 foot tall and I'm sitting front left.
Tower: What's your heigth and position? Pilot: Well, I'm 6 foot tall and I'm sitting front left.
Tower Cannot read you say again Pilot from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
Tower: Cannot read you, say again! Pilot: Again!
Tower: Cannot read you, say again! Pilot: Again!
Tower Mission triplethree do you have problems from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
Tower: Mission triple-three, do you have problems? Pilot: I think, I have lost my compass. Tower: Judging the way you are flying, you lost the whole instrument panel..
Tower: Mission triple-three, do you have problems? Pilot: I think, I have lost my compass. Tower: Judging the way you are flying, you lost the whole instrument panel..
Tower Lufthansa youre number one check for from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
Tower: Lufthansa 893, you're number one, check for workers on the taxiway. Pilot: Roger ..... We've checked, they're all working.
Tower: Lufthansa 893, you're number one, check for workers on the taxiway. Pilot: Roger ..... We've checked, they're all working.
Pilot Tower theres a runway light burning from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
Pilot: Tower, there's a runway light burning. Tower: I'm sure there must be dozens of lights burning. Pilot: Sorry, I mean it's smoking.
Pilot: Tower, there's a runway light burning. Tower: I'm sure there must be dozens of lights burning. Pilot: Sorry, I mean it's smoking.
LH Tower give me a rough time from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
LH741: Tower, give me a rough time check Tower: It's Thursday, Sir.
LH741: Tower, give me a rough time check Tower: It's Thursday, Sir.
Tower Have you got enough fuel or from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
Tower: Have you got enough fuel or not? Pilot: Yes. Tower: Yes what?? Pilot: Yes, SIR!
Tower: Have you got enough fuel or not? Pilot: Yes. Tower: Yes what?? Pilot: Yes, SIR!
Tower Shamu twotwo please state estimated time from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
Tower: Shamu two-two, please state estimated time of arrival. Pilot: Ok, let's see..., I think Tuesday would be nice...
Tower: Shamu two-two, please state estimated time of arrival. Pilot: Ok, let's see..., I think Tuesday would be nice...
Pilot Tower please call me a fuel from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
Pilot: Tower, please call me a fuel truck. Tower: Roger. You are a fuel truck.
Pilot: Tower, please call me a fuel truck. Tower: Roger. You are a fuel truck.
How many pilots does it take to from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
How many pilots does it take to change a light bulb? None, it is done by the automatic pilot.
How many pilots does it take to change a light bulb? None, it is done by the automatic pilot.
A man walks up to the counter from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
A man walks up to the counter at the airport. "Can I help you?" asks the agent. "I want a round trip ticket," says the man. "Where to?" asks the agent. "Right back to here."
A man walks up to the counter at the airport. "Can I help you?" asks the agent. "I want a round trip ticket," says the man. "Where to?" asks the agent. "Right back to here."
A man telephoned an airline office in from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
A man telephoned an airline office in New York and asked, "How long does it take to fly to Boston?" The clerk said, "Just a minute..." "Thank you," the man said and hung up.
A man telephoned an airline office in New York and asked, "How long does it take to fly to Boston?" The clerk said, "Just a minute..." "Thank you," the man said and hung up.
Cessna Jones tower Cessna student pilot I from Flashcomment Aviation jokes Jokes
Cessna: "Jones tower, Cessna 12345, student pilot, I am out of fuel." Tower: "Roger Cessna 12345, reduce airspeed to best glide!! Do you have the airfield in sight?!?!!" Cessna: "Uh...tower, I am on the south ramp; I just want to know where the fuel truck is."
Cessna: "Jones tower, Cessna 12345, student pilot, I am out of fuel." Tower: "Roger Cessna 12345, reduce airspeed to best glide!! Do you have the airfield in sight?!?!!" Cessna: "Uh...tower, I am on the south ramp; I just want to know where the fuel truck is."
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